Holiday Blues

The scientific community has not cloned human beings yet, and I honestly don't want them to do that for a whole host of ethical and moral reasons. But today, I wish I could be in two places at once. I'm really feeling blue. I wish I could go back and enjoy the Thanksgiving feasts that my Grammie and Grampie Jenkins would host. I still remember the smell of Grammie's kitchen and the taste of the pumpkin pie she would make. Although I have gotten close to it, it's still not quite like Grammie's. I cheat with my crust (thank you Pillsbury) and she made hers from scratch. Her home would be filled with my parents and my aunt and uncle and cousins. The noise of laughter and teasing still echoes in my memory and the warmth of the hugs and kisses still keeps me warm. 

I remember that Grammie and Grampie Jenkins' home was my "happy place." I used to spend nearly every weekend with them. So, I suspect part of what is making me so blue is that I had hoped to have Thanksgiving at my parents' home for the first time in nearly 20 years and recently, life has conspired to make that impossible. Living away from your family of origin may be a fantasy for some, but for Donna and myself, it's proven very difficult. It seems to get more and more difficult with each year that goes by. My children continue to grow at an alarming pace that I refuse to believe I'm also keeping.

I think my sadness is also amplified because I wish my children had the blessing of physical proximity to their grandparents that I had to mine. I didn't realize how special that was until I had my own children. Donna and I have to play an interesting game of logistics each year to figure out how to spend time with our parents so that our families stay connected. Donna's parents live in Trinidad and mine live in Maine. So Hunter's and Skye's grandparent experience is very different from that of their parents.

Don't get me wrong. We are blessed that they talk to them and see them as regularly as time and money allow. However, following through on that spontaneous urge to jump in the car and see Bampy and Mimi or Granny and Grandad can't really be spontaneous at all. So, I'm trying to stay positive by focusing on how blessed we are to have the extended family we've created with other families in town whose parents live away.

For me, that extended family is a lifeline and a priceless gift. Recently, Deppy, Jen, Cyndi and Anna jumped right in to help as a recent crisis found me in the hospital and Donna home with two children over a weekend. Without their support, I don't know how thing would have turned out. And in October, we welcomed our Yaya to Bergenfield, since Deppy's mom Betty moved here from Greece. She's adopted all of our children as her own. And we have our dear friends Madelene and Noemi, whom our children know as their Godmothers Drina and Titi, who round out our happy family. We have so many blessings, so my prayer over our table this year will include them all and a special request to our Dear Lord that he watches over my Mama and Daddy and my brothers Tony, Chad and Jeremy and their families and Donna's Mommy and Daddy and brother Terrence. May He smile on us all and help us feel the love despite the miles that separate us.

So, I'll close with this request of my readers: for all of you who have parents living just down the street or a short drive away, give them an extra hug the next time you see them. Never take it for granted and remember how blessed you are. To steal a classic line from Dickens, "God bless us, every one!"