"I'm going to marry a crazy woman."

Skye crawled into bed with me this morning after having a bad dream. Once the fear was banished and we were talking about happier things, she told me, "I'm going to marry a crazy woman, like you married Mommy." After I finished laughing, she said, "And I'll have to deal with it, just like you do." What an eye-opener for me and how I often say in response to people asking me how I live with Donna's lunacy, "I've just learned to deal with it."

It's also a glimpse into our comical moments! If it's one thing I hope we're known for, it's the laughter we share as a family. And clearly, the sense of humor and silliness that one would witness if they were a fly on the wall have definitely left an impression with our children. Sometimes, that humor also provides a salve to cushion the more challenging conversations. As Skye told Donna about how she wanted to marry a crazy woman like her, she began to describe the differences between Donna and the woman of her dreams. She told Donna, "I want her to be crazy like you, but different. Like, I want her to have long hair." Donna responded, "How else do you want her to be different?" Skye hesitated for a moment because she didn't want to hurt Donna's feelings and said, "I want her skin to be a different color." Donna kept it light and said, "So you want her skin to be white like Mama's, but you want her to be crazy like me?" Skye lit up the room with one of her most disarming smiles and agreed enthusiastically. At moments like these I pray that her  disclosure is more about describing her "type" than a red flag for racist tendencies.

I want to model a good, healthy relationship for our children. Given Skye's aspiration to marry someone just like her Mommy, it seems our example is working. It also follows the pattern that seems to be prevalent in the Graffam family. I've often joked that I have married my father, because of the similarities between him and Donna. To name a few; they both hold master's degrees in sarcasm, each of them love being in the kitchen to try new dishes, and both of them love their families fiercely. Each of them also has a penchant for demonstrating what some would call a gruff exterior.

Skye wants to marry a crazy woman

What would surprise many is that exterior is nothing more than their armor for very sensitive souls. Once you get beyond that exterior and realize what's underneath, you realize what a priceless treasure they bring with them.

I hope Skye does find a crazy woman (or man) to share her life with one day. Although the yin and yang that Donna and I manifest can be frustrating at times, when I reflect a bit more on our polarity, it's the opposing viewpoints that make us stronger. Each of us holds a different perspective, broadening our view of the world and making us more open to thoughts and ideas that we otherwise wouldn't consider.

So, if Skye does marry a crazy woman, I hope she brings into her life the same laughter, diversity of thought, strength and stability that her mother has brought into my life. I love both of my girls dearly, and I think that through the stories I've shared this year and the years prior, my readers understand why.